Before it's too late...

We played a game yesterday. I told him I could play anything he wants.
He picked up a racing game. Fine.




We played. I am not very good at controlling playstation joystick whatever.
I said I don't like the game. I can't control and the game seems easy. According to him I said I don't like it after 5 seconds we started playing. That's the way he speaks anyways. Fine.

We played more difficult level. I kept driving into water. I didn't like the map.
I said I don't like the map several times.

Suddenly screen becomes black. He turned off the game without saying anything. He was (and still is) pissed off. As far as I'm concerned, he doesn't want me to say 'no' to his favourites. I should appreciate him and his favourites. I still don't understand why I can't express my own opinion.

He said he always tried to please me and I say I don't like it to his effort. I didn't bother to argue with him. I watched a film, talked to my friends, and slept alone.

He didn't say any word and left for work. I went to school and came back around 9pm. He was playing the same racing game. Didn't say a word. I also didn't say anything, took a shower and sit on my chair.

He came he said hello and asked me whether I am still interested in taking a diving course. I said yes of course I said so already. I even told him I would pay for myself. He said he doesn't want money from me.

He said he wanted normal behaviour from me. What did I do wrong? I simply said I don't like the game, I don't like the map. What really did piss him off? And he went on about me being princess... saying things like I don't clean the house, he pays for everything etc etc.... yes of course I am unemployed and even don't have a permit to work here yet. And now he says he doesn't want to pay for my diving course. Hello? I already said I would pay for myself.

Why is he so narrow-minded and self-centred? Why do I feel like a complete stranger? Why do I so want to leave this place? Why am I here?

Before it's too late..... I should move on. Really.